Life on the Road

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I was sitting with my “littles” in the WIC office, and as always, everyone was commenting on my adorable chubby boy.

The receptionist asked how old he was, and was impressed at his size for nine months old.  Just then R.T. happened to look up at me and grin, and I kissed him on the forehead.

She said, “You breastfeed him, don’t you?”

Oh, yes.

She said that she loves to see the bond between mothers and breastfed babies – and that she can always tell.  She notices the way the baby will look up at you, or cuddle against your chest and smile, if you’re nursing. 

This is someone who has hundreds upon hundreds of mothers and babies streaming through her office…  And she is that firmly convicted.

“If only they could see what I see…” she says, then everyone would want to nurse.  She tells me she could tell the breastfeeding moms just from whose kids don’t get sick as much, are brighter, more outgoing, the list goes on.

She’d been chatting with Jewel all through this, as well, and laughedwhen she found out Jewel was only three. 

“You breastfed her, too, didn’t you?”

Oh, yes.

“For how long?”

I must have hesisted, but I was grinning…

She offered, “You’re still nursing her?”

Yeah…

She described how different things were when they went to visit the family in Cuba.  You could just be sitting there at the bus stop, and a woman would lift her shirt and let her (older) child nurse…  She mentioned one family member of her husband’s who had been nursed until he was six.

Truly, such things are normal in much of the world.  Just not here.  Just not among people who “want their body back,” and want to leave the baby with a sitter as soon as possible, and don’t want to hurt their income potential.

Why don’t more people know just how much it matters?

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CAUTION:  There is some graphic discussion of unpleasant subjects in this post, and in the links provided.  Please use your discretion about reading it yourself, and especially on behalf of your children.

 A source I deem credible told me that Barack Obama supports Partial-Birth Abortion.  I was horrified.

First, a definition, so we’re all on the same page:

The partial-birth abortion procedure — used from the fifth month on — involves pulling a living baby feet-first out of the womb, except for the head, puncturing the skull and suctioning out the brain. The great majority of partial-birth abortions are performed on healthy babies of healthy mothers.  (From the National Right to Life Committee website)

Eeeew!  People DO that?!  Oh, yes!

So, I asked the question on a discussion group I belong to, composed primarily of “crunchy” mamas – split between liberal Obama supporters and conservative Christians (an interesting sociological phenomenon which I shall explore at a later date).  I told them what I had heard, and asked if anyone had any actual, factual information about that.

I received a host of fascinating facts and links.

Here’s a highlight of the voting record:

• Obama voted against a ban on partial birth abortion (SB 230 in 1997) while serving in the Illinois senate.
• He also supports and co-sponsored the Freedom of Choice Act (Bill Number: S.1173) in the U.S. Congress which removes all restrictions (including parental notification in the case of minors) on abortions.
• As an Illinois senator, he shut down a bill that would have provided protection for infants born alive after a botched abortion (instead of being able to leave them to die.)

Someone posted a quote from the good Senator as saying:

On an issue like partial birth abortion, I strongly believe that the state can properly restrict late-term abortions. I have said so repeatedly. All I’ve said is we should have a provision to protect the health of the mother, and many of the bills that came before me didn’t have that.

This, to me, sounds like nothing more than a political spin. 

It’s really easy for him to say whatever he wants to, knowing that his position alienates a whole big segment of the population…  But actions speak louder than words, don’t you think?  Simply look at the voting record, above. 

Here’s a video of Mr. Obama with a telling quote:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNzmly28Bmg[/youtube] 

A BABY is…  a PUNISHMENT?

I hugged my kids tight and cried hearing him say that – and all the more so thinking that people are trying to elect such a person to lead our country. 

What happened to MORAL leadership?  A president we can look up to?  (I guess that all ended with Clinton?)

The Bible, of couse, says that children are a blessing from the Lord.  But even without that guidepost, can you jiggle your baby on your knee, and look at their drooly little smile, and …  I simply cannot fathom that as a serious position…

An intersting “scientific” tidbit was presented in the group discussion:

Of all methods of second-trimester abortion, the safest procedure (using mortality surveillance data) is dilation and extraction. – Source: http://www.emedicine.com/med/TOPIC3311.HTM

Erm…  SAFE?  Does the BABY think so?  As far as my understanding of the procedure, the mortality rate is 100%!  (Okay, or 50%, I suppose, if you count the mothers).  Talk about missing the point…

Here’s a powerful – GRAPHIC CONTENT – video on the horrors being perpetrated on over 3,000 American babies EVERY DAY, and about Barack Obama’s position with regard to them:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fm1WIPGbGMY[/youtube]

And just to leave you with a smile, let me suggest that perhaps the reason the good Senator doesn’t “get it” is because he’s an alien.   ;>

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vws9fTtQgz4[/youtube]

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Since this is already all put together, I’m just going to give it to you, as something important to be aware of: 

AMA Supports Proposed Legislation to Make Home Births Illegal

ABC News reported on July 11. 2008 that the “American Medical Association has agreed to support proposed legislation that, some physicians say, could make make having a planned birth in one’s home difficult, to virtually impossible.”  Presently their is no legislation but the AMA is backing what is called “Resolution 205″ which is a request to support the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists’ (ACOG) position that home births are not safe.

American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) spokesperson Gregory Phillips, stated clearly, the ACOG position, “We are against home births, period.”  He continued in the ABC story by stating, “Women who give birth outside of a clinical setting risk putting themselves and their newborns at risk.”

In opposition to this stand the American College of Nurse-Midwives has come out with a strong statement in support of planned home births. Jennifer Block, author of “Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth and Modern Maternity Care, who also writes a column for the LA Times stated in her columns that in Britain they routinely ask expecting mothers if they would like to have their babies at home instead of in the hospital.  In her column Block noted that a hand-out is given to expecting mothers from Britain’s National Health Service that says, “There is no evidence to support the common assertion that home birth is a less safe option for women experiencing uncomplicated pregnancies.”

Block also noted in her column that last year a joint statement was issued by the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists and the Royal College of Midwives that said, “There is no reason why home birth should not be offered to women at low risk of complications, and it may confer considerable benefits for them and their families.”

Ms. Block concludes her article by noting that she believes this entire issue is nothing more than a turf war by physicians not wanting to give up control. “The AMA’s statement calls for legislation that could be used against women who choose home birth, possibly resulting in criminal child-abuse or neglect charges. The group says this is about safety, but with no credible research to back up its claim, this argument falls flat.”

The various articles noted that the reaction by the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists’ (ACOG) and the AMA came about due to a documentary film called “The Business of Being Born” by talk show host Ricki Lake, where she exposed the American system of birth as a business. Abby Epstein, the film’s director stated in the ABC story, “What the film has done is to cause a lot of women to choose midwives over OBs — especially younger women who’ve never heard of midwives,” said Epstein. “We’ve received calls from midwives saying that their practices have doubled since our film was released. There’s a lot of ego in this — that one would want to choose a midwife over an MD. It’s really a turf war going back 100 years between the medical establishment and midwives.  The trailer for the film can be seen on YouTube at the following address: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DgLf8hHMgo

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I just finished reading a book about tandem nursing (Adventures in Tandem Nursing: Breastfeeding During Pregnancy and Beyond), and although I would highly recommend it, after four months it didn’t really have a lot to say on the subject that was news to me.

I was fascinated to learn, however, that a mama kangaroo makes different milk in each teat!  She makes baby milk on one side for the tiny joey finishing his development in her pouch, and “toddler” milk on the other side for baby’s older sibling who will still stick his head in and nurse.  What a great trick!  Doesn’t God think up cool stuff?

And kangaroos have it down pat for carrying the kids around, of course.  We even name a parenting philosophy/practice after them: Kangaroo Care.

If you’d like to see some lovely photos of mamas in other cultures “wearing” their babies, check out this babywearing slideshow.

Sorry, but that’s all for today.  We’re all sick, so I’m even more behind than usual… 

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I just watched the neatest video on YouTube, and I had to share it.

 No, it’s not the latest music video….  Or stupid pet tricks…  Or …  

 Actually, it was made by a governmental agency in India, with help from UNICEF and the WHO.  I’m a lot of fun at a party, eh? 

It’s really, really amazing how God made us!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3K87l9hNOE&feature=related[/youtube]

My philosophizing about why so few people would imagine that’s possible will have to wait for another day…

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Well, I didn’t think I’d have to write a post about still being pregnant at this point.

Today, March 5th, is my Due Date, according to one calculation.  My midwife comes up with March 9th doing hers.

Still, with everything that’s been going on for the last two weeks, I thought the waiting would be over by now…  But no…

We saw the midwife on Sunday, and everything is still under control.  She can chart my blood pressure at a reasonable level if she has me lie down to take it.  The swelling isn’t getting any worse.  I’m not gaining any weight.  Yay…

So we just keep on keeping on, and wait for Baby Blessing to decide that it’s time.

Saturday evening I started having some semi-strong, semi-regular contractions.  Not enough that we started running around crazily preparing to have a baby, but enough that it was REALLY distracting.

I’ve been having prodromal labor ever since – contractions every now and then.  They’re totally irregular, but strong enough to force you to pay attention. 

It makes for a long four days…

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Saw the midwife again yesterday, and the pre-eclampsia is okay for the moment, but she’s clearly stressing. I don’t have to go back for a week, but I’m to call and check in Wed, and also if I notice any number of symptoms or changes, etc., etc.

She gave me some Evening Primrose oil capsules, which are to be used nightly (topically in the appropriate spot).

I’m still on “eat lots of protein”, and even MORE on “drink lots of water” – apparently my urine is too dark and not enough, so now she’s concerned about my kidneys, too.

We’re past 38 weeks, and she’d really, really like for me to have this baby while we still have everything under control. Florida is a pretty Big Brother place, and there are honest-to-goodness set criteria where she’d lose contol and have to send me off to the (very scary) hospital…

I guess it’s time to break out some old wives’ tales of tricks to help get labor started.

Of course, since Jewel is still nursing, one of the stimulation methods often suggested is being taken care of on a regular basis… 

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Went to the midwife on Sunday for my routine prenatal visit, and things are even ickier than I thought.

She basically called it “borderline pre-eclamptic.”

My blood pressure was too high, although after some discussion she sent me to sit in the (not stifling hot) lobby with a glass of water for 10 mins, and it came down some (not nearly to my norm).

The swelling in the ankles is getting worse, not seeming to be helped by the alfalfa they recommend (I’m up to three tablets three times a day, so you’d think it would be working if it was going to).

They also found some protein and keytones in my urine sample, so I had to do a 24-hour urine catch (yesterday morning to this morning), and now have to drive the big sample jug back to them - over an hour each way, and an icky drive into Miami, so that’s NOT an appealing prospect.

I guess the “good news” out of this is that at 37+ weeks with a 3rd baby, she basically said that with the added stress there was a better and better chance that my body would just decide it was time, and the baby could come “early” (both the others were within 2 days of “the date”)…

I’ve been having lots of Braxton-Hicks contractions (never did with the other 2), and even pain in the cervix (man, that sounds funny).  Sundy at church another pg mama said, “Oh, wow, look, you’ve dropped!”  So who knows?

At this point, I would be much relieved to have the baby any time…  I’ve even gotten over my desire to wait until my mom gets here (scheduled vacation & cross-country flight = no flexibility on that).

But……. if she (I say she, we don’t know!) shows up today, or this week — she’ll have NO DIAPERS!!!  I wanted to make today into “Sewing is Job #1″ day, but in addtion to icky and achey, I’m feeling kinda paralyzed, I guess…  Bleah!!

Your prayers are appreciated! 

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Why didn’t something get done?

Is that a REASON, or an EXCUSE?  Where is the dividing line – and does it even matter?

Philosophical diversion for the day. 

For example, I’m trying to get more exercise. 

The weather here is so fickle that I don’t dare plan on going out – one day it’s 85 and so humid you’d pass out out there, the next day it’s thunderstorms and tornadoes.

Wolf found the boxes of VHS tapes in the storage stuff, and I dug out my good old “Denise Austin Pregnancy Plus Workout” tape.  I even went through it Tuesday morning – at 5 am!

Yesterday morning, Jewel woke up at 5 am.  She wouldn’t go back to sleep, and basically wouldn’t get out of my lap…  What do you do with that?

This morning I woke up with a fierce headache that’s threatening to turn into a migraine.  Definately not something that cries out to be bounced and jostled around.

So I’m 1 for 3 days with working out since I got the tape out and decided to do it.  And while every other day is really a perfectly acceptable and realistic goal, I had certainly planned to go through that workout yesterday and today…

Those are really good reasons not to have worked out on a particular day. 

But isn’t there always a good reason? 

Isn’t it sometimes still just an excuse?

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You don’t have to know me very well to get that the title of this post is something that’s highly unlikely to come out of my mouth.  We dress modestly and conservatvely, and I am anything but a “slave to fashion.”

But I did find myself in a very particular dilema recently – deciding what to wear while giving birth to Baby Blessing.

We’re going to be at the birth center, so the “hospital gown” option that may have immediately come to mind is not even an option.  It’s a “come as you are” kind of atmosphere, and women wear their own clothes – or not.  Most women end up naked by the time the whole thing’s over, from everything I’ve seen and heard, similarly to if you were at home.

Well, that just wasn’t working for me.

Fist of all, I really don’t want to be stark naked in front of a whole bunch of people including midwives and my teenage son.  Yeah, I do get that it’s sort of ironic to feel that way, when everyone is going to be staring at the – exposed – most private parts of my anatomy as the baby emerges…  But until we get to THAT level of intensity, I need to be able to relax.

And secondly, I have done this before, and I know me well enough to know that I’m not going to be comfortable without some kind of top on to give me a little support.

All of which is further complicated by the fact that they have lovely giant whirlpool tubs in each room, so I will likely labor in the water at least part of the time (and thus have to deal with wet clothes of whatever sort).

So, what’s a mama to do?

I first thought of a “sport bra” type top, which would give some support with the rigidity of a bra.  This is what I wore at Jewel’s birth, although the particular top in question is no longer with us (elastic only last so long, ya know?).  But they seem to be getting much more complex these days, and expensive, and not many options in my size, and not really suitable for nursing in afterwards… 

Binsi makes some specially-designed birthing clothing, which really looks neat, as do Glamourmom’s nursing tank tops.  Alas, neither makes tops in my size. 

So, what’s a Big Mama to do?

In desperation, I posted an appeal on a WAHM networking group I belong to.  As always, I got an interesting variety of responses, ranging from the silly to the ”I obviously didn’t even read your message before I dashed this off” irrelevant to the actually useful.

I chased down a couple of leads, but it seemed like the perfect thing just didn’t exist – and if it possibly did, it was horribly expensive.

[Ed. Note: In proofing this, I wonder if you all are going to think that this is a paid review, or a commercial message...  In all honesty, I am just so sick an tired of poor service and people with bad attitudes that I really want to let the whole world know about it when I find something or someone that's really outstanding.  Keep reading, because there are both to be found below.  The person in question had no idea that I was going to blog about her when we were conducting this transaction].

Then I got a note from Judy at A Mother’s Boutique.  Like several other notes, she let me know that her online shop has a great variety of Nursing Bras available. 

But very UNLIKE all the other notes I received, she went on to suggest a couple of specific items which she thought would be suitable for my size and purpose, and attached photos.  She even told me about one she was planning to order a sample of, and offered to get the sample in my size if I thought I would like it.  (Lo and behold, her suggestions were actually relevant!)

We talked about the options, and she even called one of the manufacturers to confirm the sizing on one possibility that someone else was claiming would fit my size (while the posted descriptions indicated that it wouldn’t).  The maker said no-go, and I was relieved not to be out the time and money on that one!

I asked her about one she had recommended – the LLLI Pull-over Sport Nursing Bra - that looked like just the type thing I wanted, but also didn’t look from te specs like the sizes would work out right.  (Click on the name to have a look.  The photos are quite modest and motherly, but I’m still not going to post it here).

Judy’s next email really made me smile.  She’d tried the bra on herself, she said, and explained her size and the relative fit.  She again offered to let me try it, and promised a painless return if it wasn’t something that would work for me.

How could I resist that level of service?  I ordered the bra, and it arrived quickly.  And it fits!  And it’s comfortable!

Am I going to go jogging in it?  Ummm… no.  Trying to imagine me going jogging at all, though, is a pretty entertaining passtime, so that’s really not an issue. 

I wrote to tell Judy how delighted I was, and that I thought I should probably get another one for jacuzzi-wetting backup and all.  And… she’s having a sale, so I get this one even cheaper!  (Valentine’s Day – 15% off bras through Feb. 14th).

If you are a nursing mama, or know one, I highly recomend making Judy your go-to shopping stop for everything you need for nursing (not just bras!).