Life on the Road

(Hormonal disclaimer: this post is a lttle rambling… the baby seems to be stealing my brain cells more than usual toady) 

A two year old girl was recently accepted into Mensa (”The High IQ Society”) - click here to read the whole story.

One thing I found entertaining was their overall comments about how few kids are in Mensa.  So?

What, do people think that kids are dumb, and their IQ increases as they get older, so then they can get in?  Um, no.

The issue here is testing.  What earthly reason is there to give your two year old that kind of evaluation?  The way most people qualify for Mensa is when they realize they can get in using the scores from a test they took for another reason altogether - like the SAT - or as an adult, they get curious enough to take a specific test to determine if they are eligible. 

Now it happens that Nick became a member of Mensa at a very young age - because the testing was done for another specific purpose (which is another whole story that I will save for another day).  Anyhow, the tests showed that Nick was amply qualified for Mensa.  Thinking ahead to his college applications, I figured it would be funny for him at 17 to be able to say he’d already been a member of Mensa for more than a decade. 

So while I have no doubt that Jewel could also qualify for Mensa at the tender age of two, I see no reason to go through the time and expense of testing her.  I also haven’t given her swimming and violin lessons, nor given her poetry to memorize.  I was treated to that sort of curriculum as a toddler, and my mother and I both agree at this point that that’s not necessarily the best way to go.  The things that happen naturally, happen … naturally! 

Yes, she counts well.  Yes, she knows a lot of colors.  Yes, she draws a pretty mean circle (and loves making happy faces).  She also loves to be read to, and will sit and “read” books to herself or anyone who will listen.  Which brings me to another funny thought.

People who have contact with Nick often ask wistfully, “How do you get your kids to read?”  When I first heard the question I was a little taken aback, and had no idea how to answer.  I’ve in fact been forced to consider the question of how to get my kid to stop reading (long enough to do other things!).  As I pondered the question I realized that reading is simply such a fact of life in our house that our kids learn to read just as they learn to walk and eat … naturally.

Some of the most interesting things about the article I started with were actually in the comments that followed.

A whole bunch of people said things like “what the big deal?  My kids does all those things, too!”  Missing the point, of course, that the items mentioned in the article were just some illustrations the reporter picked out, and not, in fact, items from the test (which of course aren’t discussed, to ensure continued validity of the test).

Another whole bunch of people had negative comments, many implying that the parents were potentially doing harm to their child by pushing her.  Now, while I do believe that they probably are pushing to some extent (as I discussed above), I also believe that many of the nay-sayers are probably coming from a position of jealously or discomfort, and are simply sniping in an effort to make themselves feel better. 

Let’s face it, smart people don’t fit in.  Smart girls fit in even less.  The extra-pretty girl has lots of friends and admireres.  The extra-athletic girl has friends and admirers, too, as the star of the soccer team or what-not.  But the extra-smart girl is a “nerd.” 

I don’t want my kids to feel pressured to perform, and I don’t want them to feel like they should stifle their talents for social acceptance.  I want them to flourish, and develop into the wonderful people God created them to be … naturally.