Life on the Road

Saw the midwife again yesterday, and the pre-eclampsia is okay for the moment, but she’s clearly stressing. I don’t have to go back for a week, but I’m to call and check in Wed, and also if I notice any number of symptoms or changes, etc., etc.

I guess it’s time to break out some old wives’ tales of tricks to help get labor started.

Of course, since Jewel is still nursing, one of the stimulation methods often suggested is being taken care of on a regular basis… 

Went to the midwife on Sunday for my routine prenatal visit, and things are even ickier than I thought.

She basically called it “borderline pre-eclamptic.”

My blood pressure was too high, although after some discussion she sent me to sit in the (not stifling hot) lobby with a glass of water for 10 mins, and it came down some (not nearly to my norm).

The swelling in the ankles is getting worse, not seeming to be helped by the alfalfa they recommend (I’m up to three tablets three times a day, so you’d think it would be working if it was going to).

They also found some protein and keytones in my urine sample, so I had to do a 24-hour urine catch (yesterday morning to this morning), and now have to drive the big sample jug back to them - over an hour each way, and an icky drive into Miami, so that’s NOT an appealing prospect.

I guess the “good news” out of this is that at 37+ weeks with a 3rd baby, she basically said that with the added stress there was a better and better chance that my body would just decide it was time, and the baby could come “early” (both the others were within 2 days of “the date”)…

I’ve been having lots of Braxton-Hicks contractions (never did with the other 2), and even pain in the cervix (man, that sounds funny).  Sundy at church another pg mama said, “Oh, wow, look, you’ve dropped!”  So who knows?

At this point, I would be much relieved to have the baby any time…  I’ve even gotten over my desire to wait until my mom gets here (scheduled vacation & cross-country flight = no flexibility on that).

But……. if she (I say she, we don’t know!) shows up today, or this week — she’ll have NO DIAPERS!!!  I wanted to make today into “Sewing is Job #1″ day, but in addtion to icky and achey, I’m feeling kinda paralyzed, I guess…  Bleah!!

Your prayers are appreciated! 

Why didn’t something get done?

Is that a REASON, or an EXCUSE?  Where is the dividing line - and does it even matter?

Philosophical diversion for the day. 

For example, I’m trying to get more exercise. 

The weather here is so fickle that I don’t dare plan on going out - one day it’s 85 and so humid you’d pass out out there, the next day it’s thunderstorms and tornadoes.

Wolf found the boxes of VHS tapes in the storage stuff, and I dug out my good old “Denise Austin Pregnancy Plus Workout” tape.  I even went through it Tuesday morning - at 5 am!

Yesterday morning, Jewel woke up at 5 am.  She wouldn’t go back to sleep, and basically wouldn’t get out of my lap…  What do you do with that?

This morning I woke up with a fierce headache that’s threatening to turn into a migraine.  Definately not something that cries out to be bounced and jostled around.

So I’m 1 for 3 days with working out since I got the tape out and decided to do it.  And while every other day is really a perfectly acceptable and realistic goal, I had certainly planned to go through that workout yesterday and today…

Those are really good reasons not to have worked out on a particular day. 

But isn’t there always a good reason? 

Isn’t it sometimes still just an excuse?

We got into an interesting discussion a while back on a networking group I belong to…  I was fascinated/horrified by what Kay (the owner of My Precious Kid) had to say about car seats.

I had already bought a nice little booster seat for Miss J, since she will be graduating into that size catagory right about the time the baby comes.  But Kay was adamant from her research that these still-really-little people need to stay in a 5-point harness as long as possible to keep them safe.

There are a bunch of very sad videos on YouTube about this topic, such at this one:

.

I was convinced, and I got Miss J a “Big Girl Car Seat” from Kay’s site:  the amazing RADIAN 65 Car Seat.

There is a Radian 65 and a Radian 80, with the difference being the weight limit.  Since J is much taller than she is heavy, she will certainly be outgrowing either seat by height before she reaches 65 lbs., making the 80 unnecessary for our particular situation.  It does come in pink, though, which was tempting… 

I read though some of the reviews of the seat on Amazon.com, and it was pretty amazing to hear the variety of whines about difficulty to install, weight, etc.

Was it easy to put in my Tahoe? 

Well, okay, not as easy as the booster seat, no.  And some of the things I did have to readjust after installing it once and looking at my handiwork.  Nick helped (can you see me trying to reach over the seat to get to the buckles with my 8-months pregnant belly?  Not.), and it took the two of us… oh… maybe 10 minutes.  Let me be generous and say 15.

I’m not kidding.  Is 15 minutes, once, not a totally reasonable time investment for something that can save your child’s life?

I have a little more sympathy for people who said it doesn’t fit in their vehicle.  I was originally going to put it in the center of the back seat, where she’s currently riding.  Turns out it can’t be installed there, because of the seatbelt buckle configuration of my pre-LATCH vehicle.  But of course after watching Kyle’s video (above), it really shouldn’t be there, anyway, as there’s no place in the center back to link a top tether!

So, off to the side she went…  The passenger side, because that’s where I happened to put it, and because that’s where it’s easiest to see her.  Whoops, then over to the driver’s side…

It’s a Florida thing, but people here are not big on obeying stop signs or stopping when a light turns red.  At a 4-way stop, you have a 50/50 chance at either side of the vehicle.  But a left turn leaves the passenger side vulnerable, whereas a right turn doesn’t open you up - so I feel much safer here with her on the driver’s side.

(BTW, installing again on the driver’s side, now that we’ve “got the drill down” and have all the correct straps installed and adjusted, took about 3 minutes).

It has so many great features you just can’t dismiss:  steel frame construction, trim profile and upright position (J HATES reclining!), a unique “safe strap” for use in certain configurations (including Miss J’s) that would help reduce the strap load on her in the event of a collision (WOW!), it folds flat for travel and transport (and is FAA approved for airline use)… 

I find it in all ways superior to the Britax Marathon we have now . . . and did I mention that it’s a lot less expensive?!

Where was this seat when I was shopping so diligently 3 years ago?  Yep, it’s new… 

I’m not overly paranoid about stuff, but it did creep me out when I read this:

One third of all personal care products contain one or more ingredients classified as possible human carcinogens.

 I mean . . . Eeew!

Does this mean that “organic” isn’t just for the “crunchy” folks among us anymore?  Where do you even begin?

One thing I tried recently was the skincare products from One Group, which is an Australian line that is all certified organic…  In fact, they claim to be

. . . the world’s first and currently only fully certified organic skin, personal and oral care products to food standards.

The facial cleanser and moisturizer certainly felt nice going on, and smelled nice - was that sunflower?  One thing I HATE is when something is so “natural” that it looks and smells kinda like . . . mud. 

Of course you can’t tell everything about a skin care line from one use, but it was encouraging.  There are certainly plenty of things in the world that you can rule out from just one use - or less!  LOL

I’m a big fan of La Leche League, and I’ve often wished there was more I culd do to support them than just my annual membership dues and the occasional volunteer project.  Well I just got an email from them listing a whole bunch of creative ways to help!

Some are the now-popular internet choices like shopping through their affiliate links.  Some are really simple and free - like using a certain search engine!  And if your employer participates in the CFC, or matches funds, you’re in really good shape! 

Check out this list:

• Buy LLLI intimate apparel and baby clothes at www.llliclothes.com. This is our own brand, developed  using LLLI Leaders and volunteers .

• Combined Federal Campaign - New Campaign Number
  If your employer participates in the CFC, please select La Leche League International (CFC # 10495) to support LLLI. Ask your human resources staff to see if you can do this.
• Shop at Amazon.com and Support LLLI
  Visit the Freepledge.com site and shop as you normally would at Amazon, and support LLLI at the same time. It’s easy! Holiday idea: Festive purchases you’d be making anyway can help LLLI. Learn more.. .
• iGive.com
  This program generates funds for LLLI when you purchase items from a long list of companies, many of which you may already be patronizing! Holiday idea: Festive purchases you’d be making at many websites you already patronize can help LLLI. Learn more…
• Good Search
  There is new and easy way to raise money just by searching the Internet with GoodSearch.com. It’s simple. You use GoodSearch.com like any other search engine — the site is powered by Yahoo! — but each time you do, money is generated for LLLI. We hope that not only will you use GoodSearch as your main search engine from here on out, but will also pass this message on to your friends and family. The more people who use this, the more money will go to LLLI.
• i.think inc.
  Through this program, you fill out confidential surveys and earn money for La Leche League. Learn more…
• LucyShares
  This program is part of LatchOn.org, and connects needy LLL Groups with sources of materials. Learn more…
• Matching Funds
  Does your employer match funds when you contribute to a nonprofit organization? Check our list of companies that match funds to see if you are able to increase your giving in this way!

And if you are (or know!) a breastfeeding mom, or expectant mom, the place to start is La Leche League.  Lots of online resources, plus a way to search for a local meeting near you.

So, after the Horrific Hospital Tour, and the relief of hearing about some options at my LLL meeting, hope was restored.

Sunday after church Wolf took us on a wonderful surprise drive.  We went all the way up into Miami (half hour drive) for lunch at Baja Fresh.  (There’s not one nearer to us.  It’s a favorite of mine (and Nick’s), but Wolf doesn’t particularly like it, so we rarely eat there).  Yummmy - and very sweet of him.

Then he revealed Phase II of his Master Plan — we were only a few miles away from Miami Maternity Center, and Sunday is the day they do tours.  (The director, Shari, is Jewish, so they’re closed on Saturdays… unless you go into labor, of course!).

I cannot begin to tell you what a huge burden was removed from my shoulders, essentially from the moment we walked in…

Shari is one of the best-known midwives in the country, and in addition to running the birth center she runs a midwifery training school there.  So there were midvives, student midwives, pregnant mamas, men, women, and children of all ages mingling happily in the outer areas.

First we were shown two movies.  One introduced us to the center, and Shari, and some of her philosophies and policies.  The second was a birth in the outside jacuzzi of the clinic, from just before crowning to the first happy moments with mama and papa holding their new little bundle of joy.

One thing that I suspect is an eye opener for a lot of people was this:  Your ob and hospital make more money the more problems you have, and the more interventions they perform.  On the other hand, Miami Maternity charges a flat fee (which includes even childbirth classes and your prenatal vitamins!), so they make more money by keeping you healthy and having everything go smoothly!

A lovely student named Joelle gave us a tour of the facility.  Prenatal care rooms, postnatal checkup rooms, and in a separate building out back, the actual birthing center.  They have 3 suites set up back there, each including a huge bed and a jacuzzi tub.  They’re never all full at the same time, she assured us, but just in case, Shari’s house (the next building over) is also set up for births, and there are 2 additional suites set up in the new classroom building.  (And if a hurricane is coming, all the imminently due mamas usually go camp out there).

Then we got to have a chat with Shari.  Although she no doubt had many, many things to do - especially as we showed up without an appointment or anything - she took the time to talk with us about all our questions and concerns.  She was very reassuring about my issues with Jewel’s birth, and we both felt confident that we would be in very good hands.

To my delight, she then said, “Do you want to hear the baby?”

Now I am not personally a fan of the doppler.  I am opposed to the gratuitious use of ultrasound, which that is - even at a low dose. 

But, like with Jewel, we wanted the opportunity to hear the heartbeat at least once - it’s such a powerful moment, and so reassuring. 

So Baby Blessing is alive and well - and feisty, as Shari said he (we’ll just go with “he”, to have a pronoun handy) was kicking the doppler!

I’ll have my first “real” appointment probably next week, but it’s such a relief to know that we have such a wonderful place to go…

No, that doesn’t say “Fast Food that is good” - it says good food that is quick! 

Once upon a time, I made my own meal replacement bars.  When I only had one child, such things seemed possible.  Today?  Not so much.

Sometimes I do eat the commercial bars out there … Zone, Luna, PowerBar, and that sort of thing.  But they’re pretty pricey (over a dollar, even in bulk), and they do have some stuff in them that’s just as well done without.

So I was excited to read about Bizzy Lizzy Bakery’s “Hearty Cookies” (aka “Breakfast Cookies”).

We tried the Hearty Chocolate Chip variety.

I was surprised as soon as I opened the box.  Each cookie is sealed in an individual airtight baggie!  I guess you CAN keep the fresh-baked taste, at least for a little while…

My whole family loved them!  Nick would have eaten a whole bunch of them a la “cookies and milk,” if I hadn’t stopped him to save some for the rest of use.

They’re not just “cookies,” and they deserve more respect than that! 

They taste good enough to be cookies, but they’re full of nutrition, and could actually be a hearty snack.  I wouldn’t call one cookie “breakfast,” even with milk…  But we still eat largely on the bodybuilding schedule of five or six small meals a day., and a cookie and milk makes a perfect mid-meal meal!

The price intimidated me at first:  $24.95 sounds like a lot for some cookies! 

But shipping is included, which would probably add a lot to the back-end, as these babies are heavy!  And most importantly, they aren’t “just cookies” like your average oreo, so that’s not a fair price comparison.  Remember back at the beginning of the post where I said PowerBars were over $1 each, even in bulk…  Well there ya go!  And these are better, too.

There’s also one other magic ingredient that other snack bars don’t have:  they’re made just for you, with love.

“Lizzy” is a real person, and the family business is to make these fresh goodies just for you.  Can’t beat that…

P.S. Aside from their everyday usefulness, I’m going to sock some away in the freezer for those tough days at the end of the pregnancy, with a brand-new baby, and as snacks by the nursing chair! 

So we came here because the circumstances were right to settle down while we have a baby.  But of course we had no idea what we were getting into as far as the outlook for having a baby in the state of Florida.

Baptist seems to own almost all the hospitals here, and the description of the Birth Center at the brand-new hospital here in Homestead sounded great.  So we went for a tour.

I was… I don’t think it’s too strong a word… horrified. 

Wolf said it “lived up to every modern birthing horror that you’ve dreamed about in your darkest subconscious recess”, so you see it really wasn’t just my hormones getting the better of me.

Let me share with you just a few of the highlights (lowlights?) of the tour:

• While showing us the labor/delivery room, I noticed that the beds had the connectors for squat bars.  I asked the nurse if the had them available, and she said that, gosh, they must have them somewhere, but they’ve only been in the new building for a few months, and she didn’t know where they were, probably in a storage closet somewhere…
• Hospital policy is for continuous fetal monitoring - so mom is confined to bed upon arrival.
• We arrived at the lounge area near the nurses’ station where she pointed out the microwave (for dad, since you won’t be eating anything), and the fridge, which had juice in it (for dad, since you can’t be having any).  She grudgingly conceeded that I could have ice chips, or we could bring popsicles for me to suck on occasionally.
• She showed us the nursery.  I wanted to clarify that if there wasn’t any emergency, they would never have to take the baby out of my room.  She hemmed and hawed.  This conversation led to the big revelation, when she said, “You know, those people who come in with birth plans [Oooh, the way she said it! Yikes!], 90% of the time they end up with C-sections, because something comes up…”
• We moved on to the recovery rooms.  I said that I’d had two babies already and had never yet seen a recovery room, so I doubted I would stay long enough to need one this time.  She was speechless.  I looked around at the small bed, and spartan room, and asked about rooming in with baby (figured I’d find out, since you never know…).  She off-handedly said that they could certainly bring baby to me there, since they had the wheeled carriages to transport them in…

At the conculsion of this enlightening experience, we asked for a list of ob’s that delivered there.  Wolf asked if she had any recommendations for which ones might be best if we were looking for a more natural birth experience.

She hemmed and hawed some more, and finally just said straight out that most of the doctors in the area were very traditional/conservative, and it was the result of an extremely litigous climate in the state of Florida.  She offered the name of a group of midwives, suggesting we might have better luck with them.

I just stewed for a couple of days.  After the challenges the accompanied Jewel’s birth, I don’t feel comfortable doing a homebirth with this one, so my options were starting to look pretty limited.  This was going to be harder than I thought.

Luckily, the local chapter of La Leche League was meeting that week.  If anyone would know how to have a natural birth in this crazy place, it surely would be them… 

Sure enough, nobody was having any nursing challenges, so the small meeting happily got off topic to discuss births.  All agreed that the lawsuit-happy Floridians had created a very inhosptiable climate in hospitals, and one mom said she had travelled out of state to have a VBAC!

The highlight of the discussion was a new mom’s testimony about the Miami Maternity Center.  But that’s another story…  

Last Friday was a singularly exasperating day.  It wasn’t until it was almost over that I got the “Ah-Ha” moment about a totally different way to interpret the events…  But let me begin at the beginning.

Thursday morning, Jewel woke up with a nasty bug bite on her leg.  This is only a little unusual, as bugs seem to find her especially tasty.  This bite was a doozy, though, and more inflamed than anything else we’ve seen.  We kept an eye on it…

Friday morning we checked her… the bite on her leg was looking really awful.  It almost looked like it was blistering up and weeping.  AND there was another bite that looked like the beginnings of the same thing on her arm. 

That was enough for me, and I prepared to take her to the doctor. 

Oh, yeah…  WHAT doctor? 

We’re new here, and don’t know any doctors…

I started by trying to find someone on our health plan.  This is a somewhat tedious process when you’re feeling the urgency.  I look at the online directory and find a provider I think I’d like to see.  Then I call the PLAN office, who calls to verify that the doc in question is still accepting the plan, and accepting new patients.  Then the plan gives me the docs phone number, and I can call them…

Seems some doctors won’t see a new patient on a “crisis” basis.  You have to come in for a check up and “get acquainted visit” before they’re willing to squeeze you in for the urgent stuff.

Some doctors’ offices close at noon on Friday.

Some doctors, listed as “Family Practice,” actually only see patients ages fifteen and up!  Fifteen?!  I adored the family practice doc Nick and I saw when we lived in the Santa Monica, CA area when he was an infant.  “Family Practice” is supposed to mean that you see the whole family…

The local “Urgent Care” clinic had some very disturbing customer reviews posted online, so much so that we didn’t dare go there.

After exhausting all the appropriate docs within 20 miles or so on the plan, we called our landlords and asked for a recommendation.  Unfortunately, their doc, too, quits at noon on Friday…

I was almost ready to tear my hair out, and take her to the E.R. 

I HATE the E.R., I hate the wait…  and it was hardly an “emergency”…  But what was I supposed to do?

Luckily I got a flash of inspiration.  I went to the local La Leche League meeting last week, and still had the leader’s contact information on my desk…  I called her and asked for a recommendation.  After the careful disclaimer that she was “taking of her LLL hat”, she told me about the doc they went to on the infrequent occasions that they went at all.

I called Dr. Geraldi’s office, they were very kind, and agreed to see her that afternoon!  Yay!

By the time we arrived, the leg bite was dark and horrible looking, and the arm was starting to blister and weep.  I was horrified, and relieved that we had found a doctor at last.  Paying full price out-of-pocket for the visit suddenly didn’t seem like such a big deal.

He checked the bites, and agreed that it was something that needed treatment.  He thought it was probably a spider, although probably not a brown recluse (a reasonable fear, though, given the appearance).  After confirming that he only gives antibiotics when they are truly needed, he recommended one.

Relieved, we headed home…  well, to the pharmacy. 

On the way there, I bothered to actually read the prescription, and saw that he was giving her Augmentin.  Wow!  That’s not just your garden-variety antibiotic like Amoxycillin - that’s the “big guns” that they bring out  when they need a tough, broad-spectrum solution.  If he felt that was necessary, I’m more glad than ever that we went! 

And, of course, something like that (even the generic) is NOT on the list of “free” or “$4″ antibiotics that pharmacies are promoting like crazy these days…  So, although we saved a nice bit with our discount plan, it was still pretty pricey to get the oral antibiotic, as well as the topical ointment.

Finally heading home, I got the flash of insight.  I turned to Wolf and said, “I wonder if all my frustrated searching this morning was really just God closing doors.  (I did my “God is talking to you” voice)  ‘Stop worrying about the money.  Find a good doctor, and I will provide…’”

(P.S.  We got a lot of bug spray while were out, too, and Jewel is doing MUCH better now!)